Some facts..

Hitching is easy if you look heaps povo.
Ham makes you sick if you leave it out of the fridge for two days and eat it.
Canberra is heaps plain and dull but has HEAPS of hot chicks.
70 year old serbian women are cool.
Rachel smells.
Astin is a homo.

TO INCREASE MY CHANCES ALL I HAVE TO DO IS SHOW UP!

If you want dancing man i leave that 100% up to you... the problem is the neighbour over the road is big on calling the cops for noise complaints... that and my landlord is across the road too... so dancing and load music would have to cease as soon as the cops show up...

YES I AM THE KING AND NO I'M NOT SECOND ONLY TO RICHARDS... I'M SECOND ONLY TO ME! ME YOU HEAR!

Richards is 'in charge' but i'm the King!!! I only leave him in charge coz he's probably the most responsible of all us cunts, that and i'm just fucking too lazy to be in charge... i'm like the Fat king who reaps the benfits but doesnt do much else...

What he's in charge of is what i'm king of... and what that is isnt quite clear...

Ahhh drunk drunk drunk... Austin hit the nail on the head... my party is purely for my picking up purposes... but dont let the chicks know... its a surprise...

The guy in the Cafe suggested we get a club with nails sticking out of it and belt Austin with it... i like that idea...

untill i think of more bullshit that is deserving of this blog... see you cunts in hell

It's Not Easy Being Stevie


I hate when the bitches in the Cafe call me that. Do you know that on level 26 we call that Cafe Attitudes in honor of Andrew the goofy wog cunt who runs the show down there?

But yeah Jeff. All of your points are valid and I am feeling the same way you are.

But to curb my problems lat night I fixed the issues by doing to following.

1. Sober - Had 3 beers after hockey and went drink driving. (I was quite pissed after that it was great)
2. Not High- Had Knockers and Alex shout me a session. It was great.
3. Horny - Played with Knockes in my touching kind of way. Which wasn't enough to blow my load but it was relieving. Also a change room filled with guy's takes my sexual appetite away.
4. Broke - Pay day today. Everythign is sorted.

And the grand pinnate

5. Bored - To solve my boredom I pored boiling water all over Pablo's kitchen floor (Thankfully the night before he leaves for Canberra.. Which was last night) Then I put bread in the boiling water and then I poured this honey/caramel stuff all over the bread. And then Knockers put her cup of soup all over the place and she then took responsibility for the mess. I followed that up by sticking sticky tape all over the kitchen and leaving the house with the shower running. Apparently there we're maggots in the morning.. Which I believe were noodles from the soup but of course.. Kansas thinks differently. And the smell was nasty. And there was a mess and people walked through it without knowing it was there which is exactly what I wanted to achieve. It's just proof that motley Crew Fridays still exist in my broken, fragile heart.

I have decided to make punch at your party. It will be hardcore and responsible for getting me laid. That is my plan. So ladies and gentlemen please bring all the clear spirits you have and chuck them in. I want to see vomiting. I want to see hangovers. I want to see drunkenness. I want to see pussy!

Jeff.. You will have a higher chance of picking up if you turn your garage into a rave and put lights and techno in there and have the rest of the house donated to punk rock. Trust me. Dance is fantastic! And the bitches love it if its funky and you can stick your dick in a nd be like.. woah this is great!!!!

I love you Jeff. You are the king.. Only second to Richards and maybe tied with Allan.

Austin.

WHY DOE WORK SUCK? WHY DOES THIS BLOG SUCK? WHY DO ALL MY FRIENDS SUCK? WHY OH WHY OH WHY!

These are questions philosophers have, for millenia, tried to answer... and we will continue to pursue the elusive answer for the truth to these extremely deep and meaningful questions...

I'm bored...
I'm sober...
I'm not high...
I'm Horny...
I'm Broke...

There are 4 things i strive to have in my life Fun, Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, and Money... and as you can see from te above statements i am obviously not doing or do not have any of the 5 things above mentioned... hmmm why is this... once again... no-one knows and i doubt anyone cares...

Party!

I THINK I'M HAVING WITHDRAWL SYMPTOMS FROM SEX...

Its been a week and a half and every half decent chick i see i imagine fucking... hmmm... this can be good untill you get a boner while standing in work pants... and boners are a hard thing to hide while standing up... thankfully no-one has noticed yet and if they have they havent said anything... (note this only really happens while standing at the station on whilst on the train)...

WELCOME TO JEFFS SWINGERFEST! LADIES PLEASE BE SO KIND AS TO LEAVE ALL YOU UNDERWEAR AT THE DOOR, THUS SAVING YOU FROM HAVING TO REMOVE THEM AT A LATER STAGE IN THE EVENING... ENJOY!!!

This weekend i will be gassing up for my Part(a)y and drinking like a Mo-Fo... hopefully there is a wicked turn up as Allan has invited everyone in his phonebook as well as everyone in my phonebook and if anyone else wants to they can invite everyone in their phonebooks too... Ah the fun of partying... i got big plans for the weekend... BIG plans...

Ah fun funfun fun funf unhfunfun

An ocean of teen-aged and young adult bodies swim in the thick, ceaseless, chest-pounding noise pouring from massive speakers in the front part of the hall. A disc jockey, whose stage and gear anchor the room like an altar, sets the halcyon, Technicolor mood by mixing, starting and stopping the beats with the skill of a surgeon, his hands swirling like an ancient spell caster.

Clad in tank tops, baggy pants and little else, the crowd moves and sways, some dancing, some just shuffling about. Many wander to darker spots on the floor, where they meet others, eyes shifting in the dark and arms tightly folded.

Something happens. A hand off. Something small — a pill — glints in the light. Bodies part, disappear into a side room and reappear moments later. It’s all smiles, as they return to the sea of sound.

So it goes at a rave, an anxious, twitchy 21st century sock hop where more and more airmen can go dance and socialize. It’s at raves and other places around the world where many are also finding out about and diving headlong into the drug ecstasy.




Again.. The internet is fantastic!

-Austin.

What A Saturday Night!!!!


Well. It's been a while now and the moemories are slipping away like water through a funnel but eitherr way here goes my best description on saturday night after i dropped Allan back home at pablos and picked up Richards and made our way to Homebush to try and sneak into the rave known as Two Tribes.

COULD NOT GET IN NO MATTER HOW HARD WE TRIED. UNLESS WE SNUCK UNDER A FENCE. THEN THERE WAS STILL A 75/50 PRECENT CHANCE OF NOT GETTING IN. SO WE DECIDED TO GOTO THE CARPARK TO FIND SOME PILLS. Bought "Foxes" of some dude who ased us if we were undercover. which in my opinion is the most terrible question you could ask someone after you've told them you've allready got drugs. Went back to car where we smoked a couple pipes. Went to dennis and met up with Dennis, Shazoo, Tanya, Rosalyn and Dannette. It was like hanging out a Kingswood high and made me feel uncomfertable. Took pills and made our way yo the Star Bar. Which i couldn't get into becuase of the new shorts i was wearing. Went back to dennios's to find some pants. Which of course none would fit so me and richards sat around talking shit for a while. Moved car out of car park and had a bottle thrown at me due to my loud music. Walked though darling harbour where we met 3 cool brazillian dudes and was contacted by Kat with regards to a rave in Alexandria. Found Dennis and tanya and went back to car. Saw a Ferrarri that was yellow. it was awesome! WEnt to rave.. Rave was shit. No acid or E's anywhere. Tried to wake up al for acid which failed.. Thank christ..

Made our way baclk to the city where dennis made me pull over a railway square and he found aan address to a block party in Chippendale. Went to block party. Paid $10 entry and walked in. Found more extasy. Took more extasy. Danced for a bit and then parked myself in this laundry/bathroom and proceeded to talk to everyone that came to use the toilet. Richards and i met so many people. There were allot of chicks and dudes and peopel that weren't from sydney. There was a hot blonde who was so hot i had to go and find her.. but failed.. Then there was this other hot chick who vomited and spacked out but when she came to all she had for richards and i was hugs and kisses. It was the most amazig thing that had aveer happened to me at a party. Her hugs were awesome and she was hot. and her kisses.. well.. they we're just fine.. then there is a huge blank spot and all i an remember is smoking pipes with irish people..

Then i danced for a while.. Then i went home..

IT WAS RAD! I HAVE NOTHING MORE TO SAY ABOUT THIS..

RICHARDS.. IT'S UP TO YOU..

Austin.